I'm moving, and I'm sad about it!

I would be lying if I told you I was thrilled about the upcoming move.

When I first got the notice of non-renewal, I was devastated. I planned to live in this apartment for a really long time, as long as I possibly could. In the thirteen years I’ve been in NYC, I’ve lived in eight different apartments. Crazy. Moving a lot in NYC is something that’s relatively normal, but I was finally ready to be settled and grounded in a space. I really thought this could be a “forever home”.

Make plans, God laughs (I’m not especially religious).

You might be wondering why I waited until two weeks before the move to announce it. First of all, the apartment search was a nightmare. NYC is in the middle of a housing crisis and there is a historically small amount of apartments on the market. If they are available, they’re incredibly overpriced and there’s even bidding wars to secure them. It was so bad that I wondered if it was time for me to leave NYC and go somewhere else.

The other truth? I was scared. It felt like there was so much on the line (my success, my income, my future). This apartment is my job, and suddenly I was a home decor content creator who didn’t have a home. I was given the opportunity to leave my full-time in late 2023 because of my success I had from decorating this space. The timing of losing it couldn’t have been much worse. So many thoughts starting going through my head: Would brands still want to work with me? Are people only following me because of this apartment? How will I afford this move? Was all of the hard work and risk for nothing?

When I confided in my friends about these fears they reassured me that there’s nothing inherently special or different about my current apartment. I added a special flair to every space I’ve ever lived in, even going back to my college dorm room. If it wasn’t for the work I did to make it my own, it would be just another one-bedroom. I made the space, the space didn’t make me. After I posted my announcement yesterday, the words of encouragement came flooding in. There were so many people excited to see what comes next. Honestly I’m still scared, but less so knowing I have so many people in my corner.

After viewing 30+ apartments, eventually one worked out. As a creative I’m so exciting to have a blank slate to decorate. The new apartment is beautiful, seriously the kind of apartment I’ve always dreamed of living in. There’s two fireplace mantles! Big windows! A separate office! I’m confident it will be a great place to live and create, but I’m still allowed to be sad and grieve the loss of this home. We all know that change is inevitable, but that doesn’t make it any easier to accept. Isn’t that funny?

The river of life flows on and move forward, we must. I’m grateful for everyone who is part of this journey. Thank you for being here. It’s going to be a crazy ride and I’m so happy you’re a part of it.

And now I’m off to start packing. See you next time!

Chelsea